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Set the Tone | Marriage

Set the Tone | Marriage

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.” Philippians 2:3


Who’s the boss? What, submit? ME? I’m the MAN! You’re not the boss of me! Submission. Authority…. Tug-of-war. Fighting words. Any time marriage is discussed in church, it seems to center around the male/female power struggle. Are men the lords and women the slaves? Are the Bible’s rules about marriage outdated? Everyone wants to know the bottom line: Who has to do what and why? But God’s way is never about the bottom line. It’s always about going over and above. So if we start our discussion with this verse, the arguments fizzle. We have to take off the boxing gloves and reevaluate.


Read that verse again. What would a home look like if both husband and wife made this verse their goal? Imagine dividing chores, making decisions, and raising kids when both were committed to doing nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Would there be a power struggle if they each sought humility and valued the other above themselves? It’s hard to imagine this couple sparring about who’s the boss, isn’t it? Would this husband be a dictator? Would his wife resent his leadership? Probably not, when they are both committed to going over and above the minimum requirements. Jesus always took every question to the next level, and we must too if we want to be His followers. He doesn’t want anyone to settle for the bottom line.


Final Thought:

Set this verse against your family relationships. How well do they match?



Father, this convicts me. So much of my life is settling for the bottom line. I do only what’s required or what I can get away with. Please forgive me. I want this verse to define my relationships and my life. Help me do it. In Jesus’ name, Amen.